Self regulation and collaborative problem solving

So if you have been reading my blog recently you know that it has been filled with posts about self regulation and collaborative problem solving. If you don’t know what they are I highly suggest that you read Stuart Shankers and Dr Ross Green’s work. Both are amazing resources for parents and teachers.

This post is a relection that the path I decided to go down actually works. For those that don’t know my daughter has struggled to learn how to self regulate. This goes beyond normal kid tantrums. We often get things thrown at us. Lots of anger and she has no idea what she is doing. Some may say that she does but if you read more of Stuart’s work you will see that kids like Izzy lack or lag in some social skills. To be honest I would socially that most kids and adults lag in thsee behaviours.

We have been working with Izzy for a couple of months on reconozing her stressors and what to do when she feels over stressed. It isn’t always perfect but on the weekend I was amazed at her progress 

This past weekend my sister got married. This meant huge crowds, loud noises and having the cousins over. It’s a perfect storm for over stimulation and stressors. However, at some point in the day I over heard Izzy saying to her cousin and say “please leave me a lone I need a moment to calm down.” I was so proud of her. She recognize  that she was over stimulated and needed a moment.

As I have said it’s not always perfect and to be honest we still have many hard stressful moments but it is getting better. 

So what does this mean for education? LearnING about self regulation has been one of those pivotal moments in my teaching career. One of those changing moments which makes you rethink your philosophy and you overall teaching.  Having an eye open for stresses in my own child has helped me see them in my students. I know it works in my daughter and it works for my students. Often now it takes a small moment for me to say hey do you need a moment? And then they destress and we can talk about it. 

Self regulation has be revolutionary for me and my teaching and I just wanted to share this personal story.